Give Gifts, Not Clutter
I freely admit that I love giving gifts. No matter what the occasion—birthdays, weddings, Christmas, get-well-soon or I-love-you—choosing a “special something” to give pleasure to a loved one makes me happy. The trouble comes, though, when the thoughtful gift I give ends up adding to the recipient’s storage and clutter problems.
The holiday season is coming, but right now it’s birthday season in my family, and today I’m thinking specifically about birthday gifts.
There are certainly times when gifts can be necessary and gratefully received. Students struggling to make ends meet and younger adults starting out come to mind—I remember a time when I’d have been very glad of a new electric kettle or a decent-looking sweater. As we get older, though, and our homes and lives become more and more complete, we need less. Do we expect and want less? I expect that depends on the individual and social circle, but at least my friends and family give me the sense that this is true. What we really want and need is time together.
I’m now discovering that the best gifts are experiences rather than material objects. As my sister says, “I have way too many things in my house, and my kids are going to remember doing something with me, not the stuff I give them.” And it’s true—the very best childhood memories I have are all of doing something special, while I can hardly recall getting any particular gift. So this year, for my nephew’s fourth birthday, I am giving him a card with a pre-paid ticket to a skating rink. I will take him ice skating for the first time, and then out for lunch afterward. I remember my first time skating, and I’m so pleased to be giving my nephew that same wonderful experience—I hope he’ll always remember going skating with his Auntie Em.
Another suggestion I have is to give gift cards, but only if you know what stores or services the recipient would appreciate (if you’re unsure, then gift cards are a mistake, because if your cousin never goes to the movies, a cinema gift certificate will just gather dust). A gift card can be the prompt for someone you care about to finally get that new duvet cover she’s been eyeing for two years or splurge on the hardcover edition of his favourite author’s new book instead of waiting for it to come out in paperback—things you maybe wouldn’t even know they wanted, but you knew she liked Homesense and he liked books. In fact, I’m so much in favour of gift cards as an option that we have our very own Clarity Jane gift cards, for anyone who wants to give a little organizing help.
Finally, you could give someone a consumable gift, something that will bring pleasure but not leave a footprint. If you’re domestically inclined, a home-baked treat can be a rare pleasure in our busy world, or treat someone to a basket of luxury edibles from a specialty shop. A bottle of fine wine is nearly always a welcome gift, or else some good coffee or fine whole-leaf tea. Fresh flowers are lovely in any season, and when they fade, the remains are obviously biodegradable. None of these things add clutter to anyone’s home.
So you see, I’m not saying don’t give gifts. I’m just saying, think before you give.
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On an unrelated note, getting organized is in the media again. Yesterday, Oprah launched her Clean Up Your Messy House Tour, featuring Peter Walsh and his clutter crew.
